Previews: I’m already giggling like a schoolgirl. This is going to be epic.
Looks like we’re gearing up for Courtney 2.0!
Omg SHUT UP SHUT UPPPPP about Emily! I’m over this already.
There’s something creepy about Emily, like an old creepy doll in a nightmarish movie.
A trashy version of Emily could be Holly Madison, no? Sort of spitting image!
Nice muscles though bro. I don’t hate it.
Yes, I was looking forward to these deep introspective soul searching shots.
Oh my dumb Dallas Texas boy. They always get Bachelors who satisfy their largest target audience- the middle of America. Ben, the San Franciscan, was an exception- he just played the game with a quarter of his heart and came out dating a model. I feel his season should be considered a Bachelor success story. Wow, I flesh this show out way too much.
I don’t get the point of this Arie thing but it’s pretty funny so I’ll allow it.
Nice try mixing it up with the Arie bromance, ABC, but it’s not working.
I wish Arie was The Bachelor.
Because everyone stands around in empty fields in a suit and tie, thinking about the future?
TV’S CHRIS HARRISON!!! So good to see you.
Desiree: cute, doesn’t stand out though. Rose.
Screamer: I think she’s the Courtney 2.0? Rose.
Robin: They have Texas in common, and that’s about it. Rose.
Diana: single mom! She’ll stay – he wants kids. Rose.
Diana- Oh the token Divorcee/Crazy Mormon. Classic.
Sarah: I think I like her. Hope Sean will see past the arm. Rose.
You can’t comment/feel bad for the amputee!
Ashley P: Another hair stylist oh boy. Cat lady. Said the man in her life is Christan Grey. Vommit. I hate to say it, but Rose.
Lesley: She’s cute and smart and well-dressed and well-spoken! I like her. ROSE.
Didn’t catch her name: I see you in your lululemon. Rose.
AshLEE F?: PROFESSIONAL ORGANIZER??????? Crazy eyes vibe. No rose.
*One Direction video break*
Good thing they just missed the rainstorm! Always with the wet pavement.
I heard a rumor that they water down the driveway to make it look…slick? So now I’m laughing about that.
The kiss followed by the tissue wasn’t planned at alllllll
Jackie- that “marking” needed to be executed quicker.
Poker Dealer?! Producers, you slay me.
Leslie H.: Basic sorry. No rose.
Daniella: Her hair needs some work. She seems fun though.
Kelly: nice song? No rose.
Katie: wow great yoga class! #sarcasmfont
Bahahahaha yoga instructor is barefoot- I kind of love it since I’m a namaste freak, but of course she’ll be out tonight.
Taryn: Love the updo. Love she admitted she didn’t watch his season!!! Rose.
OMG SHE FELL I LOVED IT SO MUCH. At least she’s memorable?
Robyn’s gymnastics fail is the best thing ever, too bad she planned it… so it’s not.
Lace(y): All the blondes are looking alike. Rose.
I like the color of Jumbotron’s dress, sue me. Again, great casting.
Paige: She’s quirky I like her. BachPad alum, she knows the ropes already: Rose.
Tierra: She’s the screamer from above. Seems a little obsessive.
Whyyyy is he leaving her there? He’ll probably come back and be like YOU’RE THE ONE, SHOWS OVER!
It’s so funny how Chris Harrison thinks he’s bros with these Bachelors. “Go ahead, man!” hahaha
OK it wasn’t exactly what I predicted but I was close! Rose right away, damn girl. ROSE.
Oh yeah, they hate her already. This won’t end well.
Tierra’s making hometowns. I feel that’s intended to be inferred, though, so maybe not. Oh, yup, with that target on her back the tensions gonna get to her and bring out her crazy.
Amanda: secondhand embarrassment omg. Rose.
Busted hair: did these girls not have enough time to do their hair?? No rose.
Lesley is my early favorite. Which probably means she’s doomed.
Bride (Lindsay H.): Surprise kiss attack!!! She’s a certified nutjob. And maybe probably drunk. No rose.
I’M AWARE I HAVE A CLICHÉ REACTION TO BRIDE GIRL SHE IS NUTS AND IS GONE THIS EPISODE. No you’re not a prankster, you’re crazy because you meant every moment of that!
LOL is the surprise person Emily?
*One Direction video break*
Kacie B: not fair that she already had an in!! they probably already know each other from bach events. Seem too friendly already.
Sean is going to end up with one of the girls, date them for a month, then date Kacie B for a year, and then they’ll break up. El Fin.
HAHAHA all their faces when she walks in.
I think it’s weird they can remember all that stuff about her from years ago about Kacie. I’m a Bach noob though, so maybe it’s just me?
2 for 2 on roses so far!!
“I think he can do whatever he wants!” – obviously. Have the past seasons not taught you obsessive ladies anything? Even I know to expect a few twists along the way.
Selma gets a rose, Ashley H. left empty handed. I like this method, Sean. Yes please let’s avoid as many awkward rose ceremonies as possible!
Bride’s first dance. She’s definitely on something. “I think I blew it.” Hello, Captain Obvious.
These dresses are making me not like glitter anymore- kind of sad- I totally buy into that trend.
How many girls are from Tennessee this season? Honky tonk!
50 shades girl: one woman dance party, without the music, with a tie. Yeah, you can go now.
“I am so scared for him right now.” Me too girl, me too.
“I brought a rape whistle in case I’m in trouble.” – SEAN
FIFTY SHADES OF DRUNK INDEED.
The lady who is crying is the same one who hasn’t watched the show very much. Clearly she doesn’t know how to play the “game” that is THE BACHELOR.
I’m all for this new movement of passing out multiple roses before the ceremony. It could pose a whole new dynamic, challenging the power of the rose For example, what if roses are passed out, THEN girls show their true crazy, thinking they are safe. But roses cannot be retracted. Or maybe they can be?! DRAMA.
Ugh we have a rose ceremony after all.
Roses: Amanda, Lesley M. (YAYYY), Kacie B., Kristy, Daniella, Taryn, WEDDING DRESS LINDSAY OMG.
No roses: Lauren, Paige, Kelly (sang the song), 50 shades, someone else who cried (don’t they all?)
“I feel like a little bit of a bumski.” – 50 shades. Good job weeding this one out, Sean.
HAHAHA this Other Man Boyfriend drama looks amazing.
some favorite tweets:
The smell of spray tan was strong that evening. #TheBachelor
— Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) January 8, 2013
“Did I miss the memo?” Sean asks while silently wondering, “And did you miss your medication?” #bachelor
— People magazine (@peoplemag) January 8, 2013
. @saralang I started watching. OMG. Is this a real show? Are these real people? DID SHE WRITE HIM A SONG?
— Alberto (@12minds) January 8, 2013